I wrote this last night while laying in bed thinking…this is going to sound cheesy but as I wrote it, I heard it as a rap song…Feel free to comment on my apparent lack of rapping skills, but please don’t be a hater!

Here I am trying to hear Your voice, but all I hear is a jumbled mess.  I look up and see You across the room, while I’m over in this dark corner wondering why You left me again, when in reality I was the one who left You. 

Sometimes my love for You is a raging fire that can’t be contained; but most of the time there’s hardly a flicker so that I can entertain this illusion of control.

Why do I think so highly of myself when I can’t even stay faithful to the One who died for me?  This foolishness must stop. He chose to die for me, now I must choose what I will do with this life He has given me: waste it in mediocrity or waste it in pursuit of the living God.

Lord, help me to choose You.

~Charlotte